pixelmayhem (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
pixelmayhem) wrote2010-02-07 10:52 pm
pixelmayhem) wrote2010-02-07 10:52 pm
Entry tags:
Fic: Champagne Memories (1/1)
Title: Champagne Memories (1/1)
Fandom: Star Trek AOS
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy
Rating: R
Word Count: 1,129
Warnings: Crack?
Summary: That’s what they get for waking up in Vegas.
Disclaimer: Don’t own anything. I’m just playing with them. I promise I’ll return them.
This was co-written with the lovely![[info]](https://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
lindmere for ![[info]](https://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif)
st_respect ’s Ship Wars battle prompt “Hang-over.”
The first sign that you were a big shot was that they comped your room. The second was that they didn't say anything when you buzzed the front desk at 3 a.m. demanding a case of champagne, two turkey sandwiches, and a rubber sheet. The third was that they ordered a limo for you, no questions asked, to the Little Chapel of the West an hour before dawn.
Nobody looked surprised, not even the little old lady playing the organ.
They were just drunk enough that neither of them gave a second thought to dressing up for the ceremony. Bones was adamant about not being married in his Starfleet uniform, however the only rental shops open were those that specialized in showgirl costumes. Which is how they ended up with several pictures of them dressed as chorus boys and being married by the guy who sang the lead in Camelot at Red Rock Dinner Theatre on alternate Saturdays.
Luckily, the guy dressed as Elvis was willing to lend Jim his jacket, the one with the rhinestones.
They had some silk flowers, for people who forgot, even though Jim was willing to spring the extra ten credits for real ones. The question was which one of them would get to hold them. Bones, being a traditionalist at heart, decided a tussle at the altar was unseemly. So that was settled, but then they both wanted to be first to say "I do," and they argued over who had to buy the rings. They shut up just long enough for the registrar not to make them file for a divorce on the spot.
They were strangely quiet in the limo on the way back to the hotel--contemplating the seriousness of what they had done, or maybe just asleep.
"Lights. Pretty," Jim said, looking out the window before his head dropped onto Bones' shoulder.
After that everything was a bit of a blurr. Jim couldn't be sure but there might have been somebody dressed as a penguin as they heading into the hotel. Or maybe that was a Vatraxan?
Somehow, Bones managed to get him upstairs. Jim was his responsibility now, as if he'd ever been anybody else's. At least that ring was gonna be some kind of "Return to sender," whenever Bones managed to get one made, and if Jim agreed to wear it.
They staggered through the door, Jim's skinny body trying to slither through Bones' arms and onto the floor. It was lucky that the penthouse suite had three beds, because they'd already trashed two. The sheets felt cool against Leonard's bare skin, which was lucky because Jim was putting out heat like a dilithium chamber next to him.
"Not gunna--just, sleeeee?"
"Yes, just sleep, you idiot." Sleep, what a concept.
Luckily the hotel had blackout blinds. Luckily they were paid up through Thursday. Luckily.
+++++
Bones woke up with a Persian cat's worth of fur on his tongue and a desperate need to take a leak. Jim was snoring, drooling and kicking him under the covers at the same time. It was disgusting, but also almost cute. At some point during the night Bones could only suppose that Jim had wiggled his way down the bed so that he was under Leonard's right leg while cuddling it like a pillow. Untangling himself from Jim's octopus-like grip he padded to the suite's spacious bathroom.
Bones almost jumped when he saw the guy in the mirror--bloodshot eyes, pirate's stubble, and hair that would have made his mother cry. He grabbed a clean glass by the sink and started filling it with water.
Jim woke up cold and made a thumping sound as he flipped over too far and fell off the bed. His feather boa was knotted around his throat like a tie. He could hear Bones moving about in the bathroom and decided to crawl his way there. Upon reaching his destination he sprawled on the tile floor. The cool tile eased the body throb that was accompanying his hangover.
"If there's a god, then there's hot water." Jim mumbled as he grabbed the glass from Bones' hand and drank like he was in the desert, which, as it happened, he was.
"And if there isn't?" Bones said stealing his cup back and refilling it.
"Then I still want a shower."
"You might want to brush off some of that glitter first. Might clog the drain."
Rolling his eyes at that Jim started to brush himself off. It proved to be a difficult task. Glitter and rhinestones were plastered to his various orifices and was hell to get rid of. It didn't help that the shine coming off his body only intensified his headache. The mirror had some weird stains that they were never going to be able to explain to the management and Bones was...Bones was still dressed as a chorus boy.
Feeling like he needed to pluck his tongue Jim cleared his throat.
"Hey, do you remember anything about last night?"
"You mean the line dancing at the Crazy Horse, and getting on the bus with those Arcturan tourists, and you getting levitated with a couple of tigers in that guy's magic act?"
"No, I remember all that. After that."
Bones pinched the bridge of his nose. "We came here. We--you know, just like the night before. More, though. Lots more. Some stuff got broken, I think. Then you passed out for a while, and then you woke up and said you had a great idea."
"Right, I remember that. What was the great idea?"
That's when Jim's eyes were drawn to the hand that Bones had pinched his nose with. He grabbed Bones' wrist turning it awkwardly to get a better look.
Bones' wrist twinged at the rough handling and he yanked it back with a growl. "Do ya mind?"
Jim was still staring at Bones' wrist with wide eyes. Then Jim's gaze flashed to his own hand. He stood there for a moment, his mouth opened and closed like a fish.
Bones repressed a laugh. "Come on Jimmy-boy you're supposed to be a genius."
As Jim continued to gape at him, Bones decided to take matters into his own hands and used Jim's feather tie to pull him in for a deep, searching kiss.
When the kiss ended Jim was rolling his hips into Bones'. The fog that had taken over his brain had cleared.
"We got married!"
Bones rolled his eyes and kissed Jim again. When they pulled apart for the second time they were both panting.
"I have the most awesome ideas!" Jim crowed. "Let's start the honeymoon."
Bones laughed and started to drag Jim into the shower. When Jim’s gleeful voice yelled…
"I can't believe we used Elvis’ sideburns to make the rings!"
--Fin--
Fandom: Star Trek AOS
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy
Rating: R
Word Count: 1,129
Warnings: Crack?
Summary: That’s what they get for waking up in Vegas.
Disclaimer: Don’t own anything. I’m just playing with them. I promise I’ll return them.
This was co-written with the lovely
lindmere for st_respect ’s Ship Wars battle prompt “Hang-over.”The first sign that you were a big shot was that they comped your room. The second was that they didn't say anything when you buzzed the front desk at 3 a.m. demanding a case of champagne, two turkey sandwiches, and a rubber sheet. The third was that they ordered a limo for you, no questions asked, to the Little Chapel of the West an hour before dawn.
Nobody looked surprised, not even the little old lady playing the organ.
They were just drunk enough that neither of them gave a second thought to dressing up for the ceremony. Bones was adamant about not being married in his Starfleet uniform, however the only rental shops open were those that specialized in showgirl costumes. Which is how they ended up with several pictures of them dressed as chorus boys and being married by the guy who sang the lead in Camelot at Red Rock Dinner Theatre on alternate Saturdays.
Luckily, the guy dressed as Elvis was willing to lend Jim his jacket, the one with the rhinestones.
They had some silk flowers, for people who forgot, even though Jim was willing to spring the extra ten credits for real ones. The question was which one of them would get to hold them. Bones, being a traditionalist at heart, decided a tussle at the altar was unseemly. So that was settled, but then they both wanted to be first to say "I do," and they argued over who had to buy the rings. They shut up just long enough for the registrar not to make them file for a divorce on the spot.
They were strangely quiet in the limo on the way back to the hotel--contemplating the seriousness of what they had done, or maybe just asleep.
"Lights. Pretty," Jim said, looking out the window before his head dropped onto Bones' shoulder.
After that everything was a bit of a blurr. Jim couldn't be sure but there might have been somebody dressed as a penguin as they heading into the hotel. Or maybe that was a Vatraxan?
Somehow, Bones managed to get him upstairs. Jim was his responsibility now, as if he'd ever been anybody else's. At least that ring was gonna be some kind of "Return to sender," whenever Bones managed to get one made, and if Jim agreed to wear it.
They staggered through the door, Jim's skinny body trying to slither through Bones' arms and onto the floor. It was lucky that the penthouse suite had three beds, because they'd already trashed two. The sheets felt cool against Leonard's bare skin, which was lucky because Jim was putting out heat like a dilithium chamber next to him.
"Not gunna--just, sleeeee?"
"Yes, just sleep, you idiot." Sleep, what a concept.
Luckily the hotel had blackout blinds. Luckily they were paid up through Thursday. Luckily.
+++++
Bones woke up with a Persian cat's worth of fur on his tongue and a desperate need to take a leak. Jim was snoring, drooling and kicking him under the covers at the same time. It was disgusting, but also almost cute. At some point during the night Bones could only suppose that Jim had wiggled his way down the bed so that he was under Leonard's right leg while cuddling it like a pillow. Untangling himself from Jim's octopus-like grip he padded to the suite's spacious bathroom.
Bones almost jumped when he saw the guy in the mirror--bloodshot eyes, pirate's stubble, and hair that would have made his mother cry. He grabbed a clean glass by the sink and started filling it with water.
Jim woke up cold and made a thumping sound as he flipped over too far and fell off the bed. His feather boa was knotted around his throat like a tie. He could hear Bones moving about in the bathroom and decided to crawl his way there. Upon reaching his destination he sprawled on the tile floor. The cool tile eased the body throb that was accompanying his hangover.
"If there's a god, then there's hot water." Jim mumbled as he grabbed the glass from Bones' hand and drank like he was in the desert, which, as it happened, he was.
"And if there isn't?" Bones said stealing his cup back and refilling it.
"Then I still want a shower."
"You might want to brush off some of that glitter first. Might clog the drain."
Rolling his eyes at that Jim started to brush himself off. It proved to be a difficult task. Glitter and rhinestones were plastered to his various orifices and was hell to get rid of. It didn't help that the shine coming off his body only intensified his headache. The mirror had some weird stains that they were never going to be able to explain to the management and Bones was...Bones was still dressed as a chorus boy.
Feeling like he needed to pluck his tongue Jim cleared his throat.
"Hey, do you remember anything about last night?"
"You mean the line dancing at the Crazy Horse, and getting on the bus with those Arcturan tourists, and you getting levitated with a couple of tigers in that guy's magic act?"
"No, I remember all that. After that."
Bones pinched the bridge of his nose. "We came here. We--you know, just like the night before. More, though. Lots more. Some stuff got broken, I think. Then you passed out for a while, and then you woke up and said you had a great idea."
"Right, I remember that. What was the great idea?"
That's when Jim's eyes were drawn to the hand that Bones had pinched his nose with. He grabbed Bones' wrist turning it awkwardly to get a better look.
Bones' wrist twinged at the rough handling and he yanked it back with a growl. "Do ya mind?"
Jim was still staring at Bones' wrist with wide eyes. Then Jim's gaze flashed to his own hand. He stood there for a moment, his mouth opened and closed like a fish.
Bones repressed a laugh. "Come on Jimmy-boy you're supposed to be a genius."
As Jim continued to gape at him, Bones decided to take matters into his own hands and used Jim's feather tie to pull him in for a deep, searching kiss.
When the kiss ended Jim was rolling his hips into Bones'. The fog that had taken over his brain had cleared.
"We got married!"
Bones rolled his eyes and kissed Jim again. When they pulled apart for the second time they were both panting.
"I have the most awesome ideas!" Jim crowed. "Let's start the honeymoon."
Bones laughed and started to drag Jim into the shower. When Jim’s gleeful voice yelled…
"I can't believe we used Elvis’ sideburns to make the rings!"
--Fin--
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<3
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also- ELVIS SIDEBURN RINGS?!!? HOLY!! hahahaahahahaaha !!!!!
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(ALSO: Hey, I'm going on a limb, but if you do happen to like the hangover you should totally write some slash here: http://community.livejournal.com/hangover_slash/ We are new and depressingly empty.)
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Ooo community. *scampers off to look*
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